The dangers of flying

We all know that guns, flares, knives knitting needles and more than 100ml of deodorant can all be lethal if they get in the wrong hands during an flight. But if you are like me many of the other in-flight safety concerns still confound me.

Seats in the up-right position. Why? Does that 10 degrees of recline available in economy class really endanger lives? If that is the case then I am glad that I cannot afford to travel in first class where the opportunity to lay in what must be nothing short of a suicidal horizontally position.

If a reclining seat is so potentially detrimental to our health they should be outlawed. The seats should not be able to recline, just like they do on budget carriers. But don’t stop there. The seats should all be relaced by tall, straight-backed wooden chairs from an Edwardian dining setting. No reclining there.

On many aircraft the headrests are adjustable. A taller passenger can raise the headrest to match their height the ends of the headrest can also often be folded in to allow someone to rest their head. If such a minor recline is considered so dangerous then surely a raised or angled headrest must be nothing short of a weapon of mass destruction.

Whilst focussing on the seats why is having the arm rest down important. Surely in the case of an emergency the arms rests can only impede our exist. Just like the tray tables it should be mandatory to store them in the upright position during take off and landing.

Window shades - up. May as well enjoy the views as we plummet to our deaths. I would like the pilot to act as tour guide and point out the views. “On the right you will notice the spectacular Andes mountain range. On the left you will see the flames and trail of smoke from the fire in engines 1 and 2. On the right you will notice the spectacular Andes coming through the window.

I like to think that the checks the rear-view mirror before s/he banks around to the left to commence the decent into the airport. The window shades must be up to allow for a clear view of any air traffic coming up from behind.

Don’t even get me started on mobile phones, computers and iPods. If they were really a threat then we would have to put them in our checked in luggage with our hair spay, talcum powder and sticks of dynamite.

Flight attendants diligently check each of these details prior to take off and landing. Waking passengers up if required to redress their indiscretions. Using risk management principles such specific attention and correction implies that the risks are of a high level of likelihood and the consequences are high or intolerable. What does this mean? An closed window shade is highly likely (yes) AND could cause serious injury, permanent disability or death.

I am still looking for the obituary that reads “he was taken early in a tragic accident doing what he loved most closing the blinds.”

© Darren Freak